


My Soul's Lover

by yasmamamercury (Em_1)



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Hot Space Era, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-10-10 03:53:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20521502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Em_1/pseuds/yasmamamercury
Summary: The boys are just finishing up the Hot Space album and things have been tense. Brian's convinced that his boys have fallen out of love with him, until Freddie sets the record straight with a well-planned surprise.





	My Soul's Lover

**Author's Note:**

> This is a poly!queen fic, but Freddie and Brian alone are heavily featured. 
> 
> I wasn't planning on it being quite this length (famous last words, I know), but I wanted something fluffy and soft and vanilla for the boys and before I knew it I was 6k in. 
> 
> Also, a big shout out to annieapple24 for basically going "there's nothing wrong with this" when I was convinced it was awful and for helping me figure some bits out.

Brian had been lucky, he supposed. He’d never felt like an outsider within his group, even when they went from bandmates to boyfriends. Brian always felt as though he belonged with the three of them. But things were changing. They had been together, romantically, almost ten years now and the band had been together over a decade as well. Maybe they did need a change, as Freddie suggested. Although, the singer had been talking about the music - which Brian still wasn’t on board with, because really, disco? 

The air around them was tense almost all the time; they were fighting in the studio, at home, in the shops, in the street, in the pubs. Anywhere. Lately if the four of them were together, there was an argument of some sort. Brian was exhausted. And if he was honest, he was hurting too. As time went on, Brian wasn’t even sure if John loved him anymore. Especially after _ Back Chat _ \- Brian’s heart still stung from that, though he would never tell John, he didn’t want to make the situation worse than it already was. It was bad enough that the two of them had days where they didn’t speak at all. They would just gravitate around each other in the house, not necessarily avoiding, just not interacting.

Brian had even taken to spending some nights on the sofa, and he knew he was on his way to making it a regular habit. It wasn’t because the boys had kicked him out, in fact, they always made a point to try to get Brian in bed with them for the night. But Brian knew that on his especially bad nights, when his heart weighed heavy and his insecurities took over, if Roger or Freddie were to pull him close (it was rare for John to settle down beside him anymore), Brian would break down in the intimacy of the darkness. So instead, he fell asleep to the sound of the television, with only a blanket for comfort, in hopes that it would drown out his worries. It never did. 

“Brian, my darling, can you come in here for a moment?” Freddie called from the sitting room. 

In the kitchen, Brian sighed. John and Roger were out and he had been hoping to enjoy his morning in peace. Not that Freddie was a bother, generally, but Brian could feel his desire for isolation getting stronger and all he wanted to do was give into it. Nonetheless, he dutifully made his way towards Freddie. He poked his head into the sitting room and leaned against the door frame, gazing at Freddie who was seated at the piano. The older man beamed at him,

“I have a surprise for you, love.”

“A good surprise?” Brian asked, skeptically. Good surprises had become a rarity in their household.

“Well, I sure hope so.” Freddie moved over on the bench and patted the now empty space beside him, “Come sit.” 

Brian made his way over, trying to hide his wince as his cramped muscles protested, and sat down beside his boyfriend. He was getting too old to spend nights on the sofa and his body was making it known. 

Freddie immediately pulled him closer and rested his chin on Brian’s shoulder. Freddie spoke softly into his ear and Brian couldn’t help the shiver that passed through his body. He missed being close to his boyfriends, missed having their arms around him to comfort him.

“I know you’ve been feeling a little…” Freddie let his words trail off, realizing that he couldn’t pinpoint exactly what Brian must be feeling, but he was sure it wasn’t good.

“Left out? Unimportant? Ignored?” Brian supplied helpfully. He could go on too, but he figured Freddie got the gist of it. Besides, the next word out of Brian’s mouth was going to be _ unloved _, and he didn’t want to hurt Freddie like that. 

Freddie’s heart ached at Brian’s words, how could they let their dearest spiral this far down before noticing? All he wanted to do was gather Brian as close as possible in his arms and spend hours telling him exactly how much he loved him. Maybe he would, later. For now, Freddie settled for kissing Brian’s neck gently and holding him tighter. 

“I’m sorry we’ve been making you feel this way, darling. I know I can’t fix it alone, but I’ve been trying to find a way to let you know how important you are to us, to me. I love you more than you can imagine, and I hope this makes you smile, at least.”

Freddie gave him one last squeeze before pulling away and setting his fingers on the keys in front of him, ready to play. 

He took a deep breath and realized he was inexplicably nervous. Freddie prayed that Brian would like what he had come up with. Suddenly, he was worried that it wouldn’t be enough. Was Freddie being clear enough? Would Brian get the message? But it was too late to turn back so Freddie closed his eyes and let the first notes of his new song sound out, his shoulder gently brushing against Brian’s as he played. Freddie’s voice rang out strongly over the melody, 

“_ God bless my soul, here he comes now. The man with the most, how does he do it? Sure, he’s got style. He’s so heavy, he’s a trip, can do anything, anything, anything, he’s my soul brother. _” 

Brian felt a smile ghost over his lips for the first time in what felt like forever. Freddie’s voice always had a way of soothing him.

“_ He’s my best friend, he’s my champion, and he will rock you, rock you, rock you. ‘Cause he’s the saviour of the universe. He can make you keep yourself alive, make you keep yourself alive. Ooh brother, cause he’s somebody, somebody, you can love. He’s my soul brother. _” 

His stomach gave a happy flip when he realized Freddie had not just written a song for him, but about him. Brian felt that familiar tug at the back of his throat and tears began to well-up in his eyes as he leaned into Freddie a bit. Freddie’s songs were usually so shrouded in imagery and metaphor, it was almost impossible to tell what they were truly about. They were beautiful, no doubt. But this one, this one was so obviously about Brian. As if Freddie didn’t want to leave any room for doubt in Brian’s mind. Freddie moved on to the next verse,

“_ When you’re under pressure, feeling under pressure, pressure, pressure. He won’t let you down when you’re under pressure. Oh, feeling under pressure, pressure, he won’t let you down. He won’t, he won’t, he won’t let you down. He can do anything, anything, anything. He’s my soul brother. _”

Brian couldn’t hold back his tears any longer, they sprang freely from his eyes to roll down his cheeks. He rested his head against Freddie’s shoulder and closed his eyes, trying to choke his sobs back. So many emotions were swirling inside him - surely he didn’t deserve something this beautiful, this personal. They were all suffering through this godforsaken album, and Brian didn’t think he deserved any sort of special treatment for his pain. He hadn’t written any of them a song, after all. Would it have made a difference if he had? Freddie shifted a bit in his seat and wrapped his arms around Brian, pulling him as close as possible. He felt the silent sobs wracking Brian’s body, and it was enough to make Freddie’s eyes tear up. He pressed his lips to Brian’s head, 

“Talk to me, darling,” he pleaded into Brian’s curls, “what’s going on in that beautiful head of yours, hm?” 

Brian clutched at Freddie’s shirt, he only managed to get his voice barely above a whisper, “I can’t believe you wrote that about me,”

Freddie relaxed a little bit at Brian’s admission - he didn’t hate it. He rubbed Brian’s back to try to bring him some comfort, “The original title was _ My Soul’s Lover _, but seeing as it’s going on the album, naturally I had to make some adjustments.”

“You’re putting it on the album?” Brian couldn’t believe it.

Freddie hummed, “Last track on the B side.”

“John and Roger agreed?”

“Deaky’s the one who suggested it. We’ve laid down most of the track already, but it needs your special touch.”

And Brian was sobbing again. He hadn’t realized how afraid he was that his boys had simply fallen out of love with him, and that was why they were arguing all the time. He hadn’t admitted to himself that he was also sleeping on the couch to get used to sleeping alone again, that deep down he figured it was inevitable. No wonder he felt like he was falling apart. 

“Freddie…” Brian paused, what would he even begin by saying? 

“Yes, my darling?” 

When Brian didn’t answer, Freddie pulled away from him and guided his chin up. Brian’s nose and eyes were red and his cheeks were stained with tears. Freddie took his free hand to gently wipe the fresh tears away from Brian’s face. Once finished, he shifted his gaze into the hazel eyes that told Freddie everything he needed to know. The blow from the sudden understanding that washed over him left Freddie breathless,

“You thought we were going to leave you?” 

Another sob escaped Brian as his eyes shifted away and Freddie wanted nothing more than to free him of his pain. So, he leaned forward and captured Brian’s lips with his own, and cupped Brian’s face with his hands. Freddie poured every ounce of love he could into the kiss, he wanted Brian to know exactly how he felt. Freddie kissed his _ I love you _ s, his _ I’m sorry _ s, his _ forever and always _. 

Brian was so glad Freddie decided to kiss him, because he knew there was no way he would have been able to find the right words to express how he felt, not right now, while his emotions were still so raw. Instead, he gave everything to Freddie in return in hopes that the older man would understand. They pulled away for air - nothing less than that was going to keep them apart. Brian rested his forehead against Freddie’s, his hands still fisted in Freddie’s shirt. 

“Will you take me to bed, Freddie? Please?” Brian whispered. 

“Of course, darling, of course.” Freddie stole another kiss, slow and languid this time, they had all day, after all. “Come on,”

Freddie took Brian’s hands in his and led the guitarist to their bedroom. Once there Freddie took his time and kissed from Brian’s mouth to up along his jaw, before making his way down Brian’s neck.

“I’m going to kiss every inch of you, my darling,” Freddie promised, his fingers working to undo Brian’s shirt buttons, “I love you,”

A few fresh tears rolled down Brian’s cheek, he pressed his face into Freddie’s neck and murmured against his skin, 

“Thank you,”

Freddie hummed and pushed Brian’s shirt from his shoulders, “Now, help me get everything off so I can make love to you.” 

Brian felt a blush start to creep up his cheeks. He kissed Freddie’s neck and tugged the older man’s shirt over his head before tossing it to the ground. Freddie brought Brian’s trousers and pants down in one go. 

“Eager?” Brian asked with a grin. 

“Very, I haven’t had you all to myself in a while.” 

“Well, to be fair, no one’s had me in a while.” Brian had intended for it to come off as a light joke, but instead he saw Freddie’s big brown eyes fill with something that looked like regret. Or maybe it was sorrow? Brian wasn’t sure because as soon as Freddie blinked it was gone. 

“Hush now, darling,” Freddie comforted, “that’s all going to change.” 

Brian leaned in for another kiss, unable to keep his distance from Freddie as he worked swiftly to strip Freddie of his remaining clothes. When he finally stepped out of his trousers, Freddie guided them towards the bed and took a moment to pull the sheets back before settling the two of them in the middle of the bed. 

Freddie took his time to lay Brian out, making sure he was comfortable before draping himself over him. He took a moment to look at Brian, just to take him in. Now that they were finally together, Freddie started to realize how long it had been since he’d seen Brian like this: beautiful, vulnerable, ready to eagerly take whatever was given to him. His heart gave a sad squeeze, so he forced the thought out of his mind. Instead, he decided to take advantage of the moment and nudged Brian’s head to the side. Once he obliged, Freddie was able to start covering Brian’s neck with kisses again. They were small at first, Freddie peppered them over Brian’s ear, his neck, and even his cheek. He hadn’t been joking about what he’d said earlier, Freddie was going to take his time with Brian and relearn every in of his body. 

If Brian was honest with himself, really wasn’t sure if he was done crying yet. Even with Freddie covering every inch of his neck and shoulders with kisses that had turned hot and open. Even when Freddie would cause Brian to shiver by occasionally swiping his tongue out or leaving a nice purple mark. Even with Freddie making him feel so good already, Brian was still emotional and he knew he would probably end up getting teary at Freddie’s tenderness with him. But Brian didn’t really want to think about that, so he closed his eyes and let his hands wander up and down Freddie’s back, appreciating the feel of his soft skin under Brian’s calloused fingertips. 

“I love you,” Brian murmured, when he suddenly realized that he hadn’t said it back to Freddie earlier. 

“I love you too, darling,” Freddie whispered against Brian’s throat. “I always will,”

“Me too,”

Freddie smiled and worked his mouth down Brian’s body to his shoulders, then down along his arms. Freddie giggled when Brian tried to squirm away from the teasing puffs of breath Freddie would let out against Brian’s sensitive skin. When he got to Brian’s hands, Freddie planted a kiss on the back of them, before turning them over and placing another kiss inside his palm. Freddie then mouthed his way up each of Brian’s fingers, 

“You have the nicest hands,” Freddie told him, honestly. He smiled when he caught Brian’s blush.

“You just like having my fingers inside of you,”

“Mm you caught me there, darling. But not today, no. Today I’m going to take care of you.” Freddie then took Brian’s thumb and sucked it into his mouth. He swirled his tongue around it, and it wasn’t long before Brian was pressing down and further into Freddie’s mouth. Freddie made sure to let out a groan before releasing Brian’s hand back to him. 

After repeating the same ritual on the other side, Freddie brought his attention back to Brian’s torso as his mouthed over Brian’s nipples, making sure to take the time to roll and tease each one into his mouth. Brian let his head fall back with a groan, whatever Freddie was doing was going straight to his cock as he felt himself gradually grow harder and soon he was gently pushing up against Freddie’s warm body. Brian _ felt _Freddie’s cheeky grin against him and resisted the urge to playfully bat his head away for it. Instead, he started gently running his fingers through Freddie’s hair. Never pushing, nor guiding or pulling, just making contact. 

When Freddied moved on, he paid extra attention to Brian’s sides - where he knew the man was ticklish - just to get to feel his lean body squirming beneath his own. Finally, Freddie relented and moved along to Brian’s stomach. Brian let out a small, surprised gasp when Freddie swirled his hot tongue over his belly button before dipping it in. Freddie then moved down to teasingly nose at Brian’s cock, causing the younger man to shiver,

“_ Fred, _” 

Freddie grinned and looked up at Brian innocently, “Yes, darling?”

When Brian met his gaze, any frustration that had started to build up melted away. Freddie’s smile, no matter how cheeky, was contagious. They spent a quiet moment just gazing at each other, and it took Brian a minute to figure out why his vision was being blurred. Before he knew it, some tears had started streaming down his cheeks again. As soon as Freddie noticed he made his way back up and gave Brian a fierce kiss. 

“I love you, Bri.” Freddie said again when they finally parted. He gently wiped away Brian’s tears. 

Brian nodded, “I know, I love you so much, Freddie.” He searched Freddie’s eyes in hopes that he would understand, “I’ve missed you,” 

Freddie gave him another kiss, “I’ve missed you too. Do you want to keep going?”

“God, yes.” 

So Freddie brought his mouth back down to land at the top of Brian’s thighs. He took his time again, relishing in the feel of Brian’s skin beneath him. He really tried to give Brian the perfect balance between tender kisses and teasing bites - each one eliciting a different, delicious response from Brian. Freddie’s cock was hard just from listening to Brian’s range of moans, pants, and sighs. But Freddie didn’t let it distract him - he was going to take all day to fuck his lover if he wanted to. And he was definitely inclined. 

Once Freddie got down to Brian’s ankles he slowly started to make his way back up. Brian was getting more and more restless beneath him, but Freddie kept at it. Occasionally he would suck deeper marks into Brian’s inner thighs. Instinctively Brian tried to squirm away from the pull of Freddie’s mouth, but Freddie held him still, leaving Brian able to do nothing but let out a high whine. Thankfully, Freddie took pity on him and moved on, eventually faced with Brian’s straining cock once again. This time, he let his mouth tease as he placed open kisses along Brian’s length. Brian tried to push his hips up but his attempts were futile as Freddie held him still through all his teasing. 

“Roll over for me,” Freddie said, when he finally came up for air.

“But I want to see you,” Brian pouted but did it anyways, not one to disobey.

Freddie started rubbing Brian’s back, “Just while I get you ready, I promise. Don’t you worry, darling, I want to see your beautiful face when I finally make you come.” 

Brian groaned into the pillow at Freddie’s words.

Freddie tsked, “Let me hear you, love.” 

He began trailing his lips over the expanse of Brian’s shoulders, just to see how long he could go on teasing Brian without actually touching him. It didn’t take long before Brian got too impatient. 

“Will you quit teasing Fred, please.” Brian had been aiming for a more jabbing tone, but instead it came out as a plea. 

“Oh my, I’ve barely even touched you and you’re already begging?” Freddie teased. 

Brian threw a half-hearted glare over his shoulder, “I’m not begging, I just want you to move it along.” 

“Alright, darling, let me take care of you.” Freddie’s hands started rubbing at Brian’s shoulders again before he slowly kneaded his way down Brian’s back. Taking care to get him nice and relaxed - because after all the stress they’d endured recently, Brian definitely deserved to relax a little. Freddie then trailed his hands down to grab a handful of Brian’s ass and Brian’s moan was unrestricted as it rang out in the room. 

Freddie reached over Brian to open the drawer on the bedside table and grabbed the bottle of lube. It was rare that the bottle was actually put away in it’s spot - it was perpetually living on the floor by the bed, lost somewhere in the sheets, or forgotten elsewhere in the flat. But with the air so tense around the four of them, Freddie had pitched it in the back of the drawer one day weeks ago while tidying up and it hadn’t been used since. Freddie coated a finger, trying to warm up the lube at the same time, before bringing his fingertip down to gently begin teasing at Brian’s entrance. Immediately, the younger man pressed up against the sensation and Freddie couldn’t help a little smirk as he obliged and pressed in. He took it slowly, just like everything else. Except that now it wasn’t to tease or draw things out - Freddie always made sure to properly prepare his boyfriends, never wanting to risk hurting them inadvertently. Hurting them on purpose, well, that was another thing, for another time. Freddie’s finger slid in easily and soon he was stroking in and out of Brian with ease. 

"Give me more, baby, please,” Brian moaned. 

Happy to oblige Freddie added a second lubed finger and started slowly stretching and working Brian open. Beneath him, Brian was already clearly torn between pushing back against Freddie’s fingers or grinding forward into the mattress. Freddie leaned down to give the small of Brian’s back a gentle kiss. 

“You’re so gorgeous like this,” he murmured. 

Brian buried his blushing face into the pillow while Freddie simultaneously brushed up against his prostate, causing Brian’s long moan to be muffled. Freddie immediately pulled his fingers away.

“I said I wanted to hear you, love.” 

Brian brought his face up to rest on his side again without hesitation. Smiling, Freddie dove back in to repeat the motion and he watched as Brian closed his eyes and opened his lips just enough to let out a filthy series of moans. Freddie took pleasure in watching Brian's reactions: his little huffs of breath, elegant fingers gripping the sheet beneath him, the way his body squirmed beneath Freddie's calculated touch.

“Fuck, Freddie if you keep going like that I - _ ah! Fuck! _I’m afraid this might be over rather quickly.” It had been so long since anyone had paid attention to Brian like this, and with Freddie’s perfect fingers working him, Brian could already feel the way his pleasure was starting to curl deep in his stomach.

“Mm, we mustn’t have that.” Freddie slowly eased off, but still kept stroking in and out of Brian. He leaned down to whisper in Brian’s ear, “Do you want a third finger, my darling?” 

Brian’s breath left him in a happy sigh, and a shiver passed through his body, “Please,” 

“Wonderful,” Freddie took the time to run his tongue over the shell of Brian’s ear, where he knew he was extra sensitive. 

“_ Freddie, _” 

Freddie let out a little chuckle at Brian's impatience, “Okay, yes, I’ll get on with it.”

“Thank you,” Brian tried to huff, but to his dismay it came out as a breathy sigh. He couldn't believe how wrecked he already sounded. Freddie had somehow managed to lube up a third finger without Brian noticing, which caused him to jump a little in surprise when Freddie started pushing in. Immediately, Freddie stilled his movements. 

“Did I hurt you, dear?” His voice filled with concern. 

“No- no, sorry, you just surprised me.” 

Happy that he hadn’t hurt Brian, Freddie continued to press his third finger into the younger man with renewed determination. 

“You take my fingers so beautifully, Bri.” Freddie cooed, as he gave Brian a moment to get adjusted. “How do you feel, baby?”

“So good,” 

Freddie let his free hand wander along the expanse of Brian’s back as he started pumping his fingers in and out of him. Freddie worked diligently to open him up, making sure to twist and scissor his fingers while whispering encouragements along the way,

“I love watching you like this, you’re so gorgeous, all nice and open for me.” 

“I’m ready,” Brian bit back a moan to get the words out, “please, Freddie, I want you inside me.”

Freddie conceded, satisfied that Brian was open enough for him, and eased his fingers out, leaving Brian to whine at the emptiness. “Come on then, I want to see you.” 

When Brian had settled on his back once more, Freddie leaned forward to press their lips together. He teased Brian’s lips with his tongue before swiping inside. Brian pushed his hips up, desperate for contact. Both men let out groans at the sensation of their cocks just brushing together at first, but soon they were instinctively moving against each other. Freddie dropped his forehead to Brian’s shoulder, he had been ignoring his own need the whole time and now found that he was absolutely aching for release. He ground his hips down against Brian particularly hard and let out a hiss at the delicious friction. 

“I really need to fuck you now, darling.” He said roughly.

“_ Please _,” was all Brian managed to say. 

Freddie captured Brian’s mouth again as he guided his cock to Brian’s entrance. Brian felt Freddie push in, and he gasped into his mouth. Freddie kept easing himself forward, taking his time again, letting Brian get adjusted to having him inside. Brian pushed against Freddie, desperately wanting more - needing to feel his boyfriend completely fill him. When Freddie finally slid all the way in, both men let out a sigh and Brian wrapped his legs around Freddie. 

“Move Freddie, please.” 

Freddie gathered Brian in his arms, pressing himself as close to the other man as possible and pulled back almost all the way out, just leaving the head of his cock inside Brian’s warm heat. He started thrusting in with long, languid strokes. Brian was groaning in his ear, his arms wrapped around Freddie, holding him tightly. Brian didn’t want any space between the two of them. He wanted Freddie beside him forever. 

“You feel so good, Fred.” He whispered, hoarsely. 

“Yeah? You like having me inside you, baby?” 

Brian nodded and stole another kiss. Freddie brought him an intoxicating mix of comfort and pleasure, still moving his hips slowly and pleasurably. Brian’s body felt as though it was on fire, he could feel every hitch of Freddie’s breath, warm on his skin, every minute movement of his body against Brian’s own. There was nothing else for Brian other than Freddie in that moment. 

“Please go faster. I need more, baby, please,” Brian could feel the beginnings of an orgasm spark low in his stomach, but he knew he would never get there if Freddie didn’t pick up the pace. 

“Anything for you, darling. I’ve got you.” 

Freddie kept true to his word and gradually increased his pace. Eventually he was pounding into the younger man, the sounds of their pleasure filled the quiet room.

“God, Bri, you’re so fucking tight,” Freddie could feel his arms straining as he kept fucking into Brian. Part of him wanted to collapse on top of Brian and chase his orgasm selfishly, but Freddie knew that it would never be as good as getting to watch Brian come undone beneath him - _ because _ of him. So it was easy to push all of those thoughts out of his mind and focus solely on making Brian feel good, and loved, and safe. Freddie pulled his head back just a little and caught Brian’s gaze. There was barely any hazel left in his eyes, Brian’s pupils were blown wide and, where Freddie expected to find desire, or lust, he saw tenderness and love. Through everything going on, Brian still looked at him as if he hung the moon. The realization hit Freddie like a wall of bricks. He fought to blink back tears as he gradually stilled his movements, Freddie’s eyes never leaving Brian’s. 

“Freddie?” Brian brought one of his hands up to cup his face.

“Brian, you know I love you so fucking much, right darling? I know I’ve said it a thousand times before, but you _ know _, right?” 

Brian smiled softly, “I know, Fred. You know that I love _ you _so much, right?”

“Yes, yes, I know.” Freddie took a deep breath to steady his emotions, “I’m very sorry, my love.”

“For what?”

“That we let you suffer through this album alone. We all suffered, but we shouldn’t have let you isolate yourself.” 

Brian shook his head and brought Freddie down for a kiss. Brian took the lead and gave Freddie’s plump bottom lip teasing nips until Freddie had his mouth parted just enough for Brian to swipe his tongue inside. Before pulling away, Brian sucked Freddie’s bottom lip between his teeth and gave a harsh tug. The filthy groan that Freddie let out went straight to Brian’s straining cock as it twitched, trapped between their two stomachs. Freddie responded with a smirk and a slow roll of his hips that had Brian clenching around him, which caused them both to let out breathy sighs. 

“_Freddie_…” Brian caught his breath before continuing, “you didn’t let me, none of you did. _I _walked out of the studio, _I_ walked out of our bedroom - even when you all asked me to stay. Even when John and I weren’t speaking, he still grabbed my arm to try to stop me from leaving the bed.” 

Brian was running his hands along Freddie’s back, “This has been so difficult, and I know it’s not over yet.” He said honestly, “I think that we all have a lot to apologize to each other for, but that’s not one of those things. Okay? I love you, Freddie. Always, through everything.”

Brian’s words eased Freddie’s guilt as he nodded. Freddie brought their mouths together again and gave their kiss time to get heated before finally beginning to move inside of Brian once more. Brian moaned as he felt the beginnings of a sharp ache as Freddie kept stretching him and thrusting deep into him. He and Freddie were pressed close enough together that with every thrust forward and every pull back, Freddie’s stomach slid against Brian’s leaking cock. But it wasn’t enough for Brian, he wanted - needed more. Unable to stand it any longer, Brian brought one of his hands away from Freddie to snake it between their bodies, but before Brian could actually finish the action Freddie was batting his hand away,

“Let me touch you, darling, please.” 

Brian happily brought his hand back up and nodded. Freddie adjusted his body slightly to allow his own hand to come between them and he wrapped his fingers around Brian’s cock, working his thumb over the head to tease. 

“Oh, look how hard you are for me, you must be aching.” Freddie cooed. Brian tried to fight the blush that flooded his face but it was useless. “What do you need, baby? Let me take care of you.” 

“Need you to make me come, please.”

Freddie sped up his thrusts a little, feeling his own pleasure begin to spike as well, and worked Brian’s cock in time with his hips. Brian closed his eyes as his head fell back to the pillow. 

“Fuck, more, Freddie, please.”

“Patience, darling,” Freddie licked a stripe up Brian’s throat, “I want to make this last.” 

Brian whined but didn’t argue. How could he, when Freddie was making him feel so good. Freddie kept the same pace until Brian was practically shaking with need beneath him. 

“Are you getting close, baby?” Freddie asked after giving Brian a particularly filthy kiss and speeding up his ministrations. Brian sucked in a sharp breath when Freddie changed his angle slightly inside of him and hit his prostate - he closed his eyes so tightly he saw stars.

“So close,” was all Brian managed to grit out in response, too overwhelmed by the sensations surrounding him. There was nothing in Brian’s world other than warm, needy pleasure and Freddie. Nothing else mattered. 

“Good,” Brian could hear the smirk in Freddie’s voice, “I am too, you feel so good beneath me, darling.” 

“Please, Freddie,”

“Yeah, I’m going to make you feel so good. I love you so much, Bri.” 

Brian opened his eyes to answer, but instead Freddie’s mouth came down on his. Freddie was pounding into him now, his fingers working Brian’s cock perfectly. Brian whined into Freddie’s mouth as he felt his pleasure build to a point of no return. With one more deep thrust, Brian was spilling himself over Freddie’s fingers, hot come coating both their stomachs. Brian sunk his face into the crook of Freddie's shoulder, shuddering and panting as he rode out his orgasm. Freddie’s thrusts had already become erratic, and it was the way Brian clenched around him through his own orgasm - deliciously tight and hot - that had Freddie coming with Brian’s name on his lips. Freddie slowed his hips as his powerful orgasm washed over him. He collapsed on top of Brian and their lips came crashing together, desperate to stay as connected as possible. Eventually, the heat of the moment wore off and their kissing slowed to a lazy swipe of tongues. Freddie pulled away just enough to look into Brian’s eyes and give him a small smile. Brian had curls plastered to his face, his cheeks were rosy, and his lips were red and puffy. 

“You’re beautiful, Bri,” Freddie whispered, almost in awe. 

Brian fluttered his lashes and gave a shy smile, “I love you, Freddie.”

Freddie gave him a quick kiss, “As do I, my love.” 

Begrudgingly, Freddie pushed himself up just enough to reach over the side of the bed, where there was a dirty t-shirt lying on the floor; John’s, he realized upon bringing it up. He rolled off of Brian, who whined at the sudden loss of warmth. 

“Where’s Roger when you need him?” Freddie mumbled. Roger was _ always _the first one to get up after sex to get the clean up process going. Leaving Freddie, and usually Brian along with him, to lie together in bliss. Brian let out a small huff of breath, too worn out to give a proper chuckle. Freddie rolled over to Brian’s side to swipe the t-shirt first along Brian’s stomach and sensitive cock, then along his own, before tossing the shirt back over the side of the bed. 

“Good enough for now.” Freddie settled behind Brian, bringing the younger man close to him, his back pressed to Freddie’s chest. Brian settled beneath Freddie’s chin, having brought the blankets up with him to cover the two of them. He felt warm and safe with Freddie holding him - Brian couldn’t remember the last time he had been held. But the thought drifted away before Brian had barely registered it. He sunk into the pillow with his eyes closed and Freddie’s voice in his ear, whispering his adorations,

“I love you, Bri,” He pressed a kiss through Brian’s hair, “forever, my darling. Forever.” 

* * *

Brian didn’t realize he had fallen asleep until the sound of John and Roger’s voices filled the silent flat. Brian stirred as the sounds reached his ears, and he wondered if Freddie had heard them. His internal musings must’ve caused him to tense up because Freddie pulled him closer and tighter, his large hand splayed over Brian’s heart.

“Relax, sweetheart,” Freddie breathed in his ear, “It’s just Rog and Deaky,” 

Freddie was right, of course. At the end of the day it was _ just _Roger and John - two of the three people who knew Brian the best, who loved him the most. At least, he still hoped they did. Brian tried to quell his anxieties. Soon Roger and John’s voices quieted down and all Brian could hear was the soft thud of their feet as they presumably made their way down the hall. Brian watched as his two other boyfriends finally walked into their bedroom, hand in hand, speaking softly with their heads close together, completely engrossed in each other. But as soon as John looked up, his eyes landed on Brian lying in their bed again with Freddie pressed up closely behind him. Brian gave him a nervous smile, and John returned it tenfold. He let out one of his blinding smiles, complete with the crinkles at the corners of his eyes. He shared his grin with Roger, then John immediately climbed into the bed and gathered Brian in his arms. 

“Will you stop sleeping on the sofa now, love?” John asked through the mop of curls in his face. 

“Did you guys plan this?” Brian accused against John’s chest, suddenly suspicious.

“Answer the question,”

Brian countered more quietly this time, “Do you still love me, John?”

John’s heart shattered. He knew things had been tense between the two of them, but he didn’t realize how badly Brian had actually been doing. After being pushed away a few times John had taken the hint and had let Brian have his space. Clearly, that had been the wrong decision. When had John gotten so disconnected from him?

“Oh, Bri, yes - always. You bloody piss me off sometimes, but I’m not going anywhere.” John assured, “Besides, where would I even go? Everything I could ever dream of is right in front of me.” 

John tightened his arms around Brian and pulled him closer, leaving Freddie to huff when Brian moved away from him. Not one to be left out, Roger managed to wiggle his way in the small space that was left between Brian and Freddie’s bodies. Sensing that Brian and John needed a moment to themselves, Roger faced Freddie and murmured his hellos. 

Brian tilted his head up to get a good look at John, “Are you still happy here, with us?”

“I really am.” John brushed his lips against Brian’s forehead, which was still creased in thought. 

“‘Cause I remember you always said you wanted a big family…” Brian trailed off, not quite able to bring himself to ask what he wanted to ask. Despite everything, he didn’t want to hurt John by questioning his dedication to their relationship out loud. Well, not even more than he already had, and especially not when Brian was pretty sure it was just his anxieties getting the best of him. 

“Yes, and? I have one, don’t I?” John replied with a grin, “I have all the family I need. You try having three boyfriends, it’s not easy you know.”

Brian couldn’t help the roll of his eyes accompanied with his smile, “Oh, you don’t say? Cheeky bastard.” 

“I know this has been really hard,” John said softly, “and I’m sorry for the hurt I caused you. I love you, Bri. Always.”

Brian buried his head in John’s chest, and closed his eyes tightly, silently begging the tears not to fall. “I’m sorry too,” Brian choked, “I was so scared that you didn’t love me anymore.”

“I’ll never stop loving you, babe. I promise.” John pressed their lips together and Brian could barely hold back his sob. He couldn’t remember the last time John had kissed him, or even just wrapped his arms around him. Brian had missed John so much it hurt.

“We miss you Bri, please stop sleeping on the sofa.” Roger mumbled from behind him. He rolled over and threw his arm over Brian, planting small kisses on his shoulder. Freddie must’ve been completely pressed up against Roger because Brian felt Freddie’s hand come to rest on his hip, giving a comforting squeeze. It was as though the final piece of the puzzle slid into place for Brian. 

“Yeah, alright. I’ll come back.” Brian let out a shaky breath against John’s chest. He was here, in his bed with his boyfriends and he felt safe and loved. Brian knew that tomorrow, he would have to face the world again. They would head back into the studio and would predictably start fighting - John would probably call him an asshole, Roger would probably yell at him to speed up, and Freddie would probably make him try the same riff a million different ways. But Brian couldn’t find it in him to worry all that much about it. He knew he would throw out his own jabs and at the end of the day they would all pile into this same bed together - where they belonged. 

**Author's Note:**

> I will admit that Freddie and Brian together without the other boys were a challenge for me to write. But I'm glad I did it, and I hope you all enjoyed it as well! 
> 
> Don't be shy, let me know what you think! You can also find me on Tumblr @yasmamamercury, where I'm always up for prompts, chats, comments, and general screaming.


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